Been feeling very lonely.

Need to rant? Looking for some opinions on how to resolve a problem. No politics or personal attacks here.
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Phazed
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Been feeling very lonely.

Post by Phazed » Thu Sep 25, 2014 6:28 pm

Hey guys..

So I've been contemplating whether or not to get back on, but the reason I'm in this folder is probably the reason I should get back on and start posting again.
Yeah. I've been a little lonely as of late. Actually, I've been feeling lonely for quite a while now. Maybe a little depressed.
I don't really know how to say this without making it obvious. I'll be vague, so just answer/advise how you see fit.

I'm in a situation where I really want to tell my friends something, but haven't found the right time/way to do so. To be honest, I've only told my best friend and 1 other person. Some background information: I'm a super self-conscious person. I hate thinking about how others see and feel about me. I always assume that it's negative. I hate how I look, and I hate what I really am. This is more of a "my friends won't accept me if I tell them" kind of thing. The reason I'm saying this on the forum is because it's more of a "safe" environment to explain this. One could say this is basically an experiment.

I guess PM me or something if you want details.
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XYZ Dragon Cannon
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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by XYZ Dragon Cannon » Thu Sep 25, 2014 11:21 pm

Good to see you back, even if it is just for a little advice.

I think I understood what you're trying to say. My advice would be to just tell them. If they really are your friends then they shouldn't have a problem with it.
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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by Star08 » Thu Sep 25, 2014 11:32 pm

XYZ Dragon Cannon wrote:Good to see you back, even if it is just for a little advice.

I think I understood what you're trying to say. My advice would be to just tell them. If they really are your friends then they shouldn't have a problem with it.
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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by jwestbro11 » Thu Sep 25, 2014 11:43 pm

Say encouraging things to yourself. I have a self confidence problem and i found if you don't encourage yourself you will just be in a circle and you will just be weighing options till what you are weighing just does not apply any more
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Phazed
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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by Phazed » Fri Sep 26, 2014 12:32 am

I just don't know how to tell them, if you guys get that. Kind of hard to. I couldn't say it in person, so when I told my best friend, I texted him.

I guess another problem comes with this. I don't know how my family would react :/
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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by Rowwdy Yisb » Fri Sep 26, 2014 2:01 am

It depends on what you're telling them to be honest, but there are a few things you could do. Maybe ask them indirectly before telling them? As in, try to get their opinion on the subject to see how they would react to anyone saying the same thing. You shouldn't be setting standards for yourself lower than you would for other people.

You could also try just slipping into a conversation like its no so much of a big deal to you, and then they most likely won't make much of a reaction.

But of course, don't force it. If you don't feel comfortable telling them, wait until you're ready. You can hold it in as much as you'd like, but you can't un-tell something.

Good luck man, I'm sure they'll understand whatever it is. We are always here if they don't ;)
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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by Wallaceman105 » Fri Sep 26, 2014 11:46 am

XYZ Dragon Cannon wrote:Good to see you back, even if it is just for a little advice.

I think I understood what you're trying to say. My advice would be to just tell them. If they really are your friends then they shouldn't have a problem with it.
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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by dracostrike » Sat Sep 27, 2014 7:11 am

If you ever want to talk or have a random chat, just hit me up on dnet or pm here ^^

I am very good at random chats ;)
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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by agentkuo » Thu Nov 20, 2014 7:54 pm

Here's what I've learned in my own experience:
•You don't have to tell anyone. I can understand wanting to tell people (there's nothing wrong with that), but you have to judge your own personal situation. Are your parents overly religious? Would they kick you out because of this? Is it the opposite? Will they love you no matter what? Everyone's situation is different, and you need to do what you think is best given your situation.

•Your friends will still be your friends, but it may not make sense to them. (Same goes for your parents). When I opened up to my friends, they didn't understand why, but they were still my friends, eventually they just kind of stopped caring. (This was in high school). My friends now fully understand and are accepting and it doesn't even make a difference to them. If your friends straight up disown you because of this, they're not your friends, they're ding dongs.

•WARNING THIS ONE MAY OR MAY NOT BE GOOD ADVICE: Being open about it and confident about it, but acting like it's no big deal (cuz in the end it really isn't) worked for me.

PM me for more details. There's 2 (technically 3) different situations in my life I'm referring to. If you want to talk about me or you, I'm open, I'm here for your if you need someone to talk to about this.

Oh, what did your best friend say? How did they take it? What did they say to you about it? (If you don't mind sharing)

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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by XYZ Dragon Cannon » Thu Nov 20, 2014 8:33 pm

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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by lz777 » Thu Nov 20, 2014 10:51 pm

Hey phazed If you ever need to talk you can always message me. I am here for you my friend. :)
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Phazed
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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by Phazed » Thu Nov 20, 2014 11:47 pm

Dang the bump
agentkuo wrote:Here's what I've learned in my own experience:
•You don't have to tell anyone. I can understand wanting to tell people (there's nothing wrong with that), but you have to judge your own personal situation. Are your parents overly religious? Not religious at all. Would they kick you out because of this? Idk how they would react. Is it the opposite? Will they love you no matter what? It's what they say.. Everyone's situation is different, and you need to do what you think is best given your situation.

•Your friends will still be your friends, but it may not make sense to them. (Same goes for your parents). When I opened up to my friends, they didn't understand why, but they were still my friends, eventually they just kind of stopped caring. (This was in high school). My friends now fully understand and are accepting and it doesn't even make a difference to them. If your friends straight up disown you because of this, they're not your friends, they're ding dongs.

•WARNING THIS ONE MAY OR MAY NOT BE GOOD ADVICE: Being open about it and confident about it, but acting like it's no big deal (cuz in the end it really isn't) worked for me.

PM me for more details. There's 2 (technically 3) different situations in my life I'm referring to. If you want to talk about me or you, I'm open, I'm here for your if you need someone to talk to about this.

Oh, what did your best friend say? Definitely support/accept me. We're a lot closer now because of what's happened over the past few months. How did they take it? Bit of a shock to all of them, I guess. What did they say to you about it? They more or less just asked some general questions like "how long have you known" and other.. personal questions. (If you don't mind sharing)
and thanks lz :D
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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by lz777 » Fri Nov 21, 2014 10:26 pm

Phazed wrote:Dang the bump
agentkuo wrote:Here's what I've learned in my own experience:
•You don't have to tell anyone. I can understand wanting to tell people (there's nothing wrong with that), but you have to judge your own personal situation. Are your parents overly religious? Not religious at all. Would they kick you out because of this? Idk how they would react. Is it the opposite? Will they love you no matter what? It's what they say.. Everyone's situation is different, and you need to do what you think is best given your situation.

•Your friends will still be your friends, but it may not make sense to them. (Same goes for your parents). When I opened up to my friends, they didn't understand why, but they were still my friends, eventually they just kind of stopped caring. (This was in high school). My friends now fully understand and are accepting and it doesn't even make a difference to them. If your friends straight up disown you because of this, they're not your friends, they're ding dongs.

•WARNING THIS ONE MAY OR MAY NOT BE GOOD ADVICE: Being open about it and confident about it, but acting like it's no big deal (cuz in the end it really isn't) worked for me.

PM me for more details. There's 2 (technically 3) different situations in my life I'm referring to. If you want to talk about me or you, I'm open, I'm here for your if you need someone to talk to about this.

Oh, what did your best friend say? Definitely support/accept me. We're a lot closer now because of what's happened over the past few months. How did they take it? Bit of a shock to all of them, I guess. What did they say to you about it? They more or less just asked some general questions like "how long have you known" and other.. personal questions. (If you don't mind sharing)
and thanks lz :D
Np I will be always be here for anyone who needs me ;)
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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by VerdeICe » Fri Nov 21, 2014 11:02 pm

Well, I have a friend or two like you. They are actually the kindest people I know, I guess its cause they are so self conscious they tend to think more about others then themselfs.

Anyway, cause of people like that I have great bouts of empathy for the lonely. So I guess I feel 4 you dude.

I wouldn't know much about being worried in a situation like yours, Im more of a say what you gotta say kind dude.

I dont know your friends, its all you though bro'. What it comes down to is if they are friends worth trusting. If what you have to say causes them to bolt, then well, how you feel after that will suck. Not gunna sugar coat it. But things sucking is how it is sometimes. Gotta know though, they can also come through, and that may bring you all closer together which is pretty awesome.

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Re: Been feeling very lonely.

Post by mastermew » Fri Nov 21, 2014 11:52 pm

may as well come back from the shadows to help.

You shouldn't have to worry about what other people think of you, because they are also worried what others think of them.

Also, if you are finding it hard to express your feelings to your friends, i dont think you should continue to we friends with them. If they are true friends, they would help you, not laugh at you.

and you shouldn't be lonely, you have us, kinda. Though you still have friends, unless its relationship lonely, thats a different story which we can discuss privately if you want.
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